Valentine’s Day Sucks If You’re single.

So I looked for reasons why it's great to be single.

It doesn’t quite make up for the lack of flowers and chocolates, but it made me feel a little bit better. Downing lots of shots later tonight should make up for the rest…

1. I don't have to fight for remote control ownership.
2. I don't have to wash smelly socks and skiddy underwear. (not that I did that anyway)
3. There are no pairs of shoes left in the middle of the floor to trip over at six in the morning.
4. I can lie in the bath for as long as we want.
5. I don't have to fake an orgasm.
6. I don't have to shave
7. I don't have anyone saying 'you're not going to wear that, are you?'
8. I don't have to suffer his cooked meals and then spend an hour trying to get the burnt, congealed mess of the bottom of our saucepans.
9. If I want to do something, I just do it!
10. I enjoy sleeping in my double bed and having it all to myself.
11. I can be moody without anyone trying to find out if something's wrong! If I don't want to talk - I just won't!
12. I have FREEDOM to choose.
13. I love waking up and not hearing the sound of snoring.
14. I love going out and not having to say where I've been or what I've been doing and what time I should be back.
15. I love going shopping and not having to hide what I've bought in the wardrobe and pretend I've had it ages.
16. I control what I spend and where I spend it.
17. I can say what I really think.
18. I can have my friends over to drink wine and behave outrageously WHENEVER I want (because he never liked those friends anyway!).
19. I don't have to worry about what sort of food to buy, I can eat whatever, whenever I choose.
20. I'm not made to feel like an idiot for sitting on the Internet - I can surf to my hearts content.
21. I can spend all night on the phone without having to justify it.
22. I go to bed when I please.
23. I can make a mess, and never tidy it up.
24. I can drink wine out of a mug.
25. I can do a smelly fart without being told it's 'unladylike'.

Source: iVillage

Naughty Valentine’s gift guide

There's not much hope for chocolates, hearts and flowers for me this Valentine's Day.

That's why I'll be opting for saucy treats from x-rated love hearts, Good Vibrations Pamper Me Pretty Gift Set, Tracey Cox Orgasm Gel to everything you need for a passionate and romantic night of foreplay.

Now – to find a bloody partner! Sob sob.

ivillage

Stars keep each other warm on the beach.

Hiehiehie….

Paparazzi took this exclusive photograph of British celebrities Victoria Beckham and Keira Knightley keeping each other warm on the beach in Malibu.



Source

ugly soccer fans streaking

I love it!

I had a fat giggle over UglyFootballers.com, a hilarious site, featuring ugly footballers and their posh wives, naked streakers, mullets, ugly fans and even ugly injuries.

And although I take my footie very seriously, this is a real laugh!

Check out the ugly streakers

164 days until I read again…!

Once again, Chav’s a little slow on the uptake. I think I’ve only read 6 books in my life. And yes, they were Harry Potter books.

So now that I’ve found out when Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows will be published (July 21st!!), I’ll count the days.

Can’t hardly wait!

Blog of a geisha

It seems that to write a blog that really attracks attention and lots of readers, you need to be a prostitute. Or a high-class Japanese hooker in training.


Following on the orgasmic success of Belle de Jour, a funny, clever, honest prostitute (yes, clearly they can be that), comes Blog of a Geisha. This 18-year old Japanese girl is receiving hundreds of thousands of hits on her blog.

Considering that the blog is written in Japanese, this is no mean feat.
Ichimame is a maiko, or an apprentice geisha, which is a hostess trained to entertain men by singing, dancing and well… other, more intimate activities. In other words, she is a high-class hooker in training.

She works at Ichi, a genteel teahouse in the Kamishichiken district, one of Kyoto’s five geisha districts or hanamachi (flower towns).

She started the “Maiko Blog” on the teahouse Web site in December 2005 to inform people about her world and to encourage people to visit Kyoto to see maiko perform.
And as the Arthur Golden, author of the best-selling book Memoirs of a Geisha could’ve told her, people really like to know about the myserious world of the geisha. In September 2006 alone, her blog received 300,000 hits.

Check it out if you can read Japanese...

Celebrity Cameltoe! Ain't nothin like it on a slow Thursday...

According to Lifestyle Buzz, there’s a strange abundance of cameltoe lately. We’re talking about the Hollywood hotties and not-so hotties.

For those who don’t know what a cameltoe is, it’s what you see if a person wears… ok no wait. If you don’t know what cameltoe is, I don’t know why you would want to read my blog in any case.

That being said, I also consider myself enlightened after learning that for men, it’s called “Moose-Knuckle”. Lol!

Check out stars like Tom Cruise (moose-knuckle!), Tyra Banks, Madonna, Jessica Simpson, Fergie etc. as they reveal a little more than we ever wanted to see (but can’t help looking at!)

Lifestyle Buzz